I'm happy you're happy.

I think I'm finally realizing I'm never really going to be the "girlfriend type" of girl. I'm always guys best friends. the girl they go to for girl advice for the girl they like, which is NEVER me. I have let you go so many times. okay just twice. but why does it always have to be people i'm friends with? the first time was my BEST FREAKIN FRIEND. you lead me on. you made me think you waanted to be with me. you asked me to go with you to prom. and then you took it all back. then you guys broke up. i held your hand through everything. you lead me on again. we talk all the time. then bam i see you this weekend and you tell me you want advice for another one of my friends you want to be with.

i know as the girl who has always secretly liked you i should want whatever makes you happy. but since you know i like you, why do you lead me on adn then go and find something better? i understand you can find someone prettier, skinner, smarter, i realize all of this. but just once i'd like to be that girl. just once. so stop playing with me adn leave me alone.